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View Full Version : Masturbation+Grinding=Weight Loss!


sexyhex
07-14-2005, 05:48 AM
Year after year we Americans keep getting reminded to stay in shape? Eat right? Exercise daily? But guess what? In the end our worrying causes us to indulge even more!. And every year we get fatter..

*1/6 of Americans are considered clinically obese (That’s 50million people)
*Average life expectancy of an obese male/female - 25-50 yrs old!
*Tell me when was the last time you seen a fat person over 100? never!
*Obesity causes regret
*Obesity causes impotence
*Obesity causes hate
*Obesity KILLS!

But what we are failing to acknowledge is to Masturbate! Masturbation may seem like a taboo, opposed in many religions as symbols of perversion and have been known to cause blindness! All of this is in fact counterfactual lies! Lies build up on top of more lies! Instead of falling for another commercial weight loss gadget consider Masturbation!

Here are some benefit’s to masturbation:

*Relieves stress
*Helps insomnia
*Stimulate the immune system to help build up resistance to common infections
*Releases mood elevating hormones which increases mental power and thinking capability
*Reduces spontaneous erections
*Increases Metabolism which helps your burn fat at a higher rate (Remember the general rule the more the merrier).
*Enables you to sexually function better when having sex with partner
*Increases Self-Esteem
*Gives a natural high during climax which no drug can do without any harmful side effects!
*Longer life expectancy

Common FAQS

"Hexer masturbation isn't "real sex" and only losers masturbate." - gafaton

Just not true. According to some sexuality experts people who masturbate tend to function better sexually when with a partner since they know their own body and have fulfilled sexual expression. - hexer

If you masturbate you will go blind or bald or get acne or hair on your hands -- or lots of other anomalies. - zelaton

None of these have any basis in truth. - hexer

People in relationships or married don't masturbate. - bizzare

Wrong again. (Many couples masturbate mutually). - hexer

"Masturbation will stunt your growth" - moggert

Nice try, but wrong again. - hexer

“If you masturbate you'll never be able to have children” - miche

I get this question as an e-mail often, this is just not true, who started this myth? If that was true none of us would be on this planet. - hexer

===========
Masturbation also promotes muscle growth! <3
Here are some pictures of me! As you see I don't have time to work out, considering I have to work, grind, and spend time with nagging girlfriend... So how do I fit it into my schedule? You guessed it.. Masturbation..


~ Most important tool, my forearm ~
http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/ind...=20050714014325
~ Burn Baby Burn... ~
http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/ind...=20050714014325
~ Hard work pays off.. ~
http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/ind...=20050714014325
~ Utterly Uncomprehendible ~
http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/ind...=20050714014325

~~~~~~~~~~~~
For more pics visit me at http://www.myspace.com/sexyhexy &
Please make sure you sign my comments!
~~~~~~

collin
07-14-2005, 05:53 AM
thats great, but Carefactor = Zero.

sexyhex
07-14-2005, 05:55 AM
thats because u haven't tried it..

Hyakku
07-14-2005, 01:24 PM
Not to bash on your thread but:

*Average life expectancy of an obese male/female - 25-50 yrs old!
*Tell me when was the last time you seen a fat person over 100? never!

50 million Americans don't live to only 25-50. Our average life expectancy is 70+. If that were true around 17% of Americans die at about 25-50 and that number would greatly affect our life expectancy, including infantile deaths etc. I could be wrong, but I doubt it...


When was the last time you saw a skinny or regular sized person live over 100? Thats not a common event lol.

Cycon
07-14-2005, 01:53 PM
I masturbate on a daily basis....

astinus
07-14-2005, 02:25 PM
Not to bash on your thread but:

*Average life expectancy of an obese male/female - 25-50 yrs old!
*Tell me when was the last time you seen a fat person over 100? never!

50 million Americans don't live to only 25-50. Our average life expectancy is 70+. If that were true around 17% of Americans die at about 25-50 and that number would greatly affect our life expectancy, including infantile deaths etc. I could be wrong, but I doubt it...


When was the last time you saw a skinny or regular sized person live over 100? Thats not a common event lol.

Not common true, but probably more common than fat people living past 75.

haaat
07-14-2005, 02:40 PM
i hear starving works too.

Hyakku
07-14-2005, 05:30 PM
Not common true, but probably more common than fat people living past 75.
yeea thats probably more correct.

Hyakku
07-14-2005, 05:31 PM
by the way, your thread fails. Try to get some real originality.

http://www.coolnurse.com/masturbation.htm

helot
07-14-2005, 06:09 PM
i hear starving works too.

So does diet and exercise.

haaat
07-14-2005, 06:15 PM
So does diet and exercise.
either or.

Devito
07-14-2005, 07:50 PM
Fucking hexer, jesus, you are the man.. CDevito <3

Mila
07-14-2005, 08:28 PM
Zelaton seriously said that? wtf

And masturbation doesn't help insomnia.

mhg02139
07-14-2005, 08:42 PM
*Longer life expectancy


no way?! seriously?!

-M

Cycon
07-14-2005, 09:08 PM
Zelaton seriously said that? wtf

And masturbation doesn't help insomnia.
I think it does. I always stay up til around 6 in the morning. If i masturbate its like oohh thats a good way to end the night.

Durgoth
07-15-2005, 08:36 AM
Guess that explains why i only weigh 145lbs =)

Medicalelf
07-15-2005, 01:22 PM
OMG hexer how are you? Come back to the game I have'nt seen any necromancer in Sieghardt that can pawn asses like you do :/. By the way masturbation can give you carpal tunnel too hahaahahahah miss yah hex :D Medi

PandoraXxX
07-15-2005, 01:30 PM
Hello mr. vibe :P :P

Moggert
07-19-2005, 02:46 PM
for some reason or another I decided to read this thread, then BAM, im in it ^.^

PandoraXxX
07-19-2005, 03:45 PM
Happens to the best of us :P

meloentje
07-20-2005, 06:37 AM
you hit 280 lb bench?? nice

Tom
10-30-2008, 07:50 PM
bump to knock retards off the first page